Saturday, December 18, 2010

My Daddy, the Prayer Warrior...


I was reminded recently about an amazing character trait that my dad embodied.  As I grew older and my dad's illness became more apparent, we began to cling as a family to the only One who gave us hope...Our Savior, Jesus Christ.  That was and still is the most amazing blessing that came out of my daddy's sickness...our strength that we found in the Lord.  We would always pray as a family, before we went to bed, before we left the house...I can remember not even being able to walk out our back door without my dad stopping me in his green recliner, grabbing my hand and saying a prayer for me.  That really struck me the other day as I was thinking about it. I never realized at the time how special that really was.  How amazing that was for my dad, to be taking a stand as a spiritual leader in our house.  And it wasn't like that from the start...just like all of us my dad had to grow into that man of God...through tragedy and triumph, my dad's walk with God continued to steadily grow. 

There was a point in my dad's life when he had been praying for someone or something ( I honestly can't remember what it was)...and my dad saw God answer his very prayer right before his eyes.  That changed my dad.  He saw a new purpose in life.  He had a child-like excitement, knowing that the God of this universe could and would answer his prayers.  I think my dad realized and understood from a very personal place that God heard his prayers.  That Jesus Christ listened to the cry of my dad's heart.  From that moment on, it wouldn't only be the prayers before we left the house or before we went to bed (although that was amazing)...my dad would hear of something, or see something in us...grab our hand, and pray to our Savior who would pour out hope and peace and invite us to bow at the foot of the cross. 

I can remember one night of praying that sincerely changed my heart...where God transformed me, and renewed my hope and faith in Him.  It was the summer of 2006, right before I left for law school.  I sat on the bed with my mom and my dad and just cried.  I was really lonely and yearned for a partner in life.  I had committed myself to God and was extremely blessed by His love relationship, but I really wanted someone in my life, who would become my husband.  I wanted to share journey of life with that person...I wanted to share my tragedies and triumphs with him.  At that moment, my mom and my dad and I all held hands...and my dad begin to pray...He begin to call to Jesus and ask that he would provide a partner...that he would provide a husband to share my life with...I couldn't believe it!! My dad, asking God to bring a mate for me??!!  That was a HUGE step for my dad.  He would have been happy if I stayed at home for the rest of my life.  And my dad knew the power of praying in God's will...He knew that God wouldn't just turn a deaf ear to the cries of our hearts.  And he still prayed that prayer.  He saw my pain, released his fear, and interceded on my behalf...Amazing. 

And less than two months later, I was introduced to the love of my life.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Four years ago today...

Four years ago today, was heart wrenching and undeniably beautiful.  It was the day that hundreds gathered to comfort us and honor an incredible man...of integrity, of wisdom, of strength...and of God. I flew home from Virginia Beach on December 7, 2006...sitting quietly in the plane seat...praying that no one would ask where I was going or what I was doing...So afraid I would break.  I sat by myself and pulled out my notebook and began writing  the following poem.  I hadn't written a poem in a long time, but as it flowed from the Lord, I knew my dad would love it.  I wanted to share it again, to reminisce about my faithful father.  I think he was really blessed (as were we) on that beautiful day, when so many cherished my dad's life right along with family.

My Daddy: What a Man :)
When you see the word gentle - don't be deceived
the tender compassion is not all to see
there is strength, tenacity and comfort therein
and a heart made of gold that never gives in

there is joy in the pain, tears in the fight
there is a strength to behold beyond power and might
this was displayed by a man here today
though his life has been lived, in our lives he will stay

Everyone says his pain is gone, he's whole nad new
and rightfully so, I know that is true
but my dad forgot his pain and condition of his life
the moment he looked into a loved one's eyes

at that moment, it was all about them
what they were doing, how they have been
all he would do was encourage us so
in the midst of his hurt, being with us made him glow

his gentleness, his eyes, his silent strength
held more hope and dignity than any could think
he was more than a husband, father, and friend
he was a brother to all, no matter what they did

he saw victory where we saw despair
he saw truth when we didn't care
at the end of our rope when we were ready to give in
he would calmly embrace the moment at hand

he was different than most; wise beyond his years
humbled and open, desperately yearning to stop our tears
though his would flow at the oddest of times
he began to not fear and not wipe his eyes

day by day though his strength would decrease
the growing man inside would never cease
to the end of this life his love never slowed
this was the man with the heart made of gold

as a husband i've noticed a commitment through time
though the rocky times came, the love never left his eyes
day after day he would say "Jane, you're beautiful,
why don't you believe me when i say i can think of nothing i would want more?"

and the dad in him was stronger than ever
even in his weakest moments - you could never say never
take for instance senior night at my track meet
dad "escaping" from the hospital, he never missed a beat

and with my brother yeah, well that was a different story
their relationship was truly meant for God's glory :)
through the remotes that were thrown and the stinky feet
their's was a relationship all fathers and sons envied

and for my dad as an uncle many tears will be cried
though he was weary, those kids made him smile
he cherished his family more than anyone i've ever known
through his words and encouragement seeds of life in us were sown

i've never entered a home and felt so much love
this man who faced death found his strength from above
always bringing life in perspective, breathing in God's creation
seeing the lord in His simplicity and living through His son

my dad's prayers were calm, yet mighty in heart
a faith that didn't waiver even when our hope fell apart
i am honored to be his daughter, blessed to carry his name
for my daddy showed me a real man, and I will forever be changed.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Take Some Time to Play!



Anyone that knows me...knows that i LOVE to have fun!  I love to laugh and experience new things, no matter how dorky or ridiculous those things are.  Anyone that knows my dad would say the same thing.  When he was feeling the least bit up for it, he was always ready to have a good time.  For the first few years of my life, I grew up on a lake with a couple of boats that my dad always seemed to be fixing :).  But every weekend, we would have people over and get out there and just have fun.  We would enjoy the water, the beach, the company...  My dad loved to host people and to make them feel right at home...to treat them with anything and everything he could. 

As I grew older, we continued to have fun...just not on the boats :).  My dad would take every opportunity to FULLY enjoy whatever it was he was doing.  My family would have these crazy halloween parties...us kids weren't allowed at the parties past a certain time - we still aren't allowed to see the home videos!  I remember one party where my family went dressed as a biker family.  My dad loaded our two fat cat dirt bikes in the back of his truck and we drove to my grandma and grandpa's house.  We stopped at the end of the driveway, because we had to make a grand entrance...My dad unloaded the fat cats and my brother jumped on his, and my mom, dad and I all jumped on the bigger one (I was about 5)...we road up the driveway, my dad popped a wheely and we all flew off the back of the bike! Hilarious...not exactly, what he was going for :). 

I loved going to the Johnson County Fair with my dad.  Every year we would have dad/daughter night where the two of us would go and eat gobs of fair food and spend waaaayyyy too much money on fair games.  My dad didn't like the rides and we both LOVED the games, so that's all we would do.  I would find a prize that I wanted and he would probably spend $50.00 trying as hard as he could to win the most impossible game.  I would come with tons of stuffed animals, gold fish, anything and everything. 

When I was in high school, I LOVED to toilet paper houses.  It was harmless and so much fun.  I won't mention any names, but a certain dance team coach would take our entire team in her van and speed through the country roads, drop us off at whatever house we had decided on, and come back ten minutes later to admire our handiwork.  No matter how much I loved it, it would usually come back to bite me...because my house would later be targeted.  Well, I got word of some of my friends that were planning on hitting my house...I warned my parents, knowing that whatever happened, I would just have to clean it up.  My dad - because he loves to have fun...decided that he would take on an new evening job.  He would fill his cooler with Big Red, hide it between our Apple Trees that lined the driveway, and sat with our two dogs and his paintball gun...waiting....and waiting...and waiting.  He seriously sat out there for several nights.  I was getting to the point where I was hoping they would come already!  One night I was out with my girlfriends and we were toilet-papering our sheriff's sons' house...and all of the sudden I hear a truck come into the driveway...i dropped in a ditch, but it was too late.  "Kelly!!!!  Your Dad just shot my truck with a paintball gun!!!!" Hilarious.  My dad did it!!!  THe boys were not too happy...but we entered a truce and joined forces for the rest of the night!  My dad loves that story!  And my house rarely got toilet papered!

Those are just a few of the many memories I have of my dad and his incredibly fun outlook on life.  I always want to remember to make sure that I'm taking time to enjoy the wonderful things that I have.  I never want to forget that each day that goes by without laughter or a new adventure is a day that is lost...I want to remember my dad by carrying on his legacy of cherishing family...enjoying the little things...and turning dreary times into joyful times (and great memories)!!